Secret Benefits Of Trauma: Your Own Special Gifts
Finding love, health, self-love, and purpose
In my personal experience and those I have met with, coached, and had relationships with, I believe there is a through-line from trauma to spiritual awakening.
When we are traumatized or abused in our lives, we have a special opportunity to grow and heal and help the world become a much better place. Discovering the unexpected benefits of trauma and how it can lead to personal growth and transformation can be very powerful for us!
As the world awakens more and more each day, we see through the lies and the abusive nature of our largest institutions—politics, religions, and corporations—to name a few. We are also noticing how we have been treated on a personal relationship level. And it’s on this personal level that we have the most control over how we can help, heal, and change this world.
My experience has been that my trauma led me to my spiritual journey. I started to find resources—people, books, groups, and communities—who had been where I had been and could help me seek understanding and support for where I had come from.
I will say right off the bat that I do not blame anyone for my past experiences because, from my own healing, I have recognized that no one ever means to hurt another. We are all just hurt people who hurt each other at times.
However, I am not a complete angel, and yes, I did blame the people from my past at one time. And that only kept me in a loop of dysfunction and anger and not progressing. Once I coached myself, had coaching from other professionals, and did some therapy, I realized that I have unconditional love and forgiveness for the people who unintentionally caused me some pain in my life. Because I am a spiritual person, I believe we all come here knowing what we are getting into. My soul (and yours!) knows exactly what it needs to heal itself each lifetime. So, with that in mind, there is no reason for me to blame and be a victim now.
There is a through-line from trauma to spiritual awakening.
All this being said, there is much room for and need to see the trauma and abuse you have had and feel ALL the feelings—anger, rage, sadness, shame, and fear—before you can let go, detach, and love unconditionally. Some therapy and coaching can help you both process and reframe your trauma and heal the limiting beliefs created by that trauma. And, as you will see, you need to heal the limiting beliefs to move through this through-line.
Although I went from my trauma toward self-help and spiritual books, I was not ready to be “all healed” yet. Not that I will ever be “all healed” while I am on this planet, but I am much farther along than I used to be. I still had a lot of egoic identity to get through.
So, I see the through-line as an anchor (initial) trauma or childhood wounding and the development of an inner critic who takes over the abuse from the original abuser(s). Later, we can eventually recognize the inner critic’s negative, shaming voice and the limiting beliefs it has created within us define how we show up in the world and how it treats us.
Then, we work on shifting the false narrative/limiting beliefs. We put light onto the shadow and realize that these inner demons are not as scary as we once believed. We come to see that we have so much more control over them than we thought, which is a wonderful lightbulb moment of inner transformation. You then start to take things less personally and become more unconditionally loving toward the people you once thought were “out to get you.” You have true compassion for others and mostly for YOURSELF, based on true love instead of fear and people-pleasing for approval and love from the outside. You love yourself from the inside now!
Practicing inner peace and presence in the now becomes almost second nature at this point. You have less inner critic chatter, or, should I say, you don’t listen to those lies and negative thoughts as much because you can now spot them and not believe them anymore. By exploring the hidden benefits of trauma, including inner strength and wisdom, deep connections with others, and personal growth — we learn how to cultivate these gifts and embrace the positive aspects of trauma to live a more fulfilling life. You are empowered. You are free!
You forgive yourself and others all the time now because you UNDERSTAND why you believed the negative things you believed and you also realize that people who are not conscious about their own beliefs don’t realize how much pain they are in and how much pain they are causing—just like you didn’t know you were in pain and causing pain either at one time.
As you go through this process, you will shed old beliefs, patterns, and relationships that no longer serve you. Those people were only mirroring your old self. You will then attract those who mirror your new self. You will also attract someone more aligned with you—your values, beliefs, and self-love. Two people who are whole as individuals make for the best union! The statement “you complete me” is not such a good one in all truth.
You complete you first.
Only then will you attract the one who is also complete. This makes for a much more harmonious connection. Don’t you agree?
And not only that, your health will improve because, let’s face it, those old beliefs and the inner critic’s voice create a lot of internal stress on our bodies, minds, and souls. So, once you have let go of your emotional baggage, your health and vitality improve. You will start to trust yourself and your intuition more as well. Your gifts—psychic, empathic, or whichever ones your soul feels compelled to use this lifetime—will come into your being the more you remove old fear blocks to self-love. You will love yourself and your body and want to choose your life purpose and your best foods and movement. The more you start to embody healthy feelings and beliefs and love for yourself, the more you stand in your truth, which is the same as your worth, and manifest abundance and other great things from your HEART (which is where we manifest from, not from our heads), which is now open.
My top three benefits of trauma
So again, I’m by no means saying that anyone should be happy about their trauma, or toxic circumstances of abuse. Strictly for a progressive healing perspective, we can make some lemonade with the lemons we didn’t ask for. So here’s what I’ve walked away with in my personal journey:
Empathy: Trauma can also lead to the development of empathy, which is the ability to understand and share the feelings of others. By experiencing our own pain and suffering, we can develop a deeper sense of compassion and empathy for others who are going through similar experiences. This can enhance our relationships and make us more understanding and supportive friends, family members, and community members.
Resilience: Trauma can help us develop resilience, which is the ability to bounce back from adversity. Through the process of facing and overcoming trauma, we can build inner strength and learn to cope with difficult situations. This resilience can be a valuable asset throughout our lives, helping us to navigate challenges and setbacks with greater ease.
Personal growth: Trauma can be a catalyst for personal growth and transformation. By facing and working through the challenges of trauma, we can gain a deeper understanding of ourselves and our values. This can lead to greater self-awareness, personal insight, and a stronger sense of purpose and meaning in our lives. Trauma can also motivate us to make positive changes and pursue our goals with renewed focus and determination.And while I would never want to tell anyone that their trauma is a blessing, I believe that, once you have recovered from it, it sure can be thought of this way if you choose to believe it.
Can you see how this latter part of the through-line is about your spiritual nature? Can you step back and see the secret gifts your trauma has given you once you’ve started healing?
If you need any help getting onto your personal journey, I would be thrilled to be your support and guide!
It is my absolute deepest desire to see everyone on this planet feeling inner peace so that we can help one another have world peace.
Also, self-love is the antidote to all forms of abuse and trauma.
